Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
