That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
