I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize