Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Randomize
