At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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