Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Randomize
