If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
