Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
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