Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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