If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I have fence marks all over my body
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
