Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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