I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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