Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
you have to choose: penises or morals?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
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