I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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