Buhtt sex?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
