WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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