thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Randomize
