my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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