Well douche your snatch and let's go!
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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