sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
