If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize