yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Randomize
