I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
