fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Drunk is a universal language darling
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