I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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