Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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