community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
It's just like the Real World with babies
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
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i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
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I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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