Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(917): View more from New York City

I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas

Fav 58 1387 6425
share tweet
(617): View more from Massachusetts

he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave

Fav 32 820 5273
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(319): View more from Iowa

I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women

(319): View more from Iowa

I wish I had your problem

Fav 11 4902 1216
share tweet
(914): View more from New York

i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.

Fav 13 6831 1311
share tweet
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(919): View more from North Carolina

its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.

Fav 73 8894 1727
share tweet
(207): View more from Maine

I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.

Fav 10 4256 1999
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(416): View more from Toronto

At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?

Fav 13 2978 1116
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(919): View more from North Carolina

Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.

Fav 5 961 623
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(702): View more from Nevada

You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?

Fav 1 55 19
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT