it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
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