fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
