I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize
