dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
