Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
