Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize