Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
they're like a gay fantastic four
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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