People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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