in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
