My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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