I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
you never un-have a 4some
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
