I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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