Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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