i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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