my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
