Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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