His pubic hair was longer than his dick
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
