careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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