I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Liz is crying about burritos again.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Randomize
