Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
