it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
