question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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