my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize